2011年9月26日月曜日

Blogging Assignment 2

  My revised thesis statement for Essay 1 is "Several specific changes in Japanese values that have occurred through the Shouwa era may be correlated with specific changes in gender roles in Japan over the same period of time." and the three main supporting ideas for this thesis are as follows. The first supporting point for my thesis is that the value that women should be free to take action leaded to the advance of women to work. The second supporting point for my thesis is that the Western value brought to Japan changed the Japanese way of thinking into a thought that men should also engage in houseworks and nursing. The third supporting point for my thesis is that the current situation which some men take place of their wives and take on all the houseworks and nursing is brought about by the value that people should live freely under their own individual value.

1 件のコメント:

  1. Hello Aya,

    I like what you're doing in terms of supporting ideas, i.e. points that show your thesis is valid, is true.

    You do need to find very succinct phrasing for each of these supporting ideas so that they can be mentioned very briefly together with the thesis, and in one sentence if possible. Hmmm.. Maybe something like this.

    Several specific changes in Japanese societal values that have occurred since the Shouwa era may be correlated with specific changes in gender roles in Japan over the same period of time, including 1) freedom for women to work outside the home, 2) acceptance by men of the need to help domestically, and 3) the idea that gender roles are a matter of personal choice.

    What do you think about this phrasing for the thesis? It's long but clear and complete.

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